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Ed. note: This is the latest installment in a series of posts on motherhood in the legal profession, in partnership with our friends at MothersEsquire. Welcome Sam Sliney to our pages. Click here if you’d like to donate to MothersEsquire.
I am … a daughter. Sister. Granddaughter. Aunt. Niece. Wife. Airman. Lawyer … and the list could go on and on. But my most treasured and rewarding title is Mother. Also known as Momma, Mommy, and Mom to my 4-year-old son and 2-year-old daughter. When I became a mother in 2017, upon learning that I was pregnant with my son, I began to learn just how challenging it is to be a mother, lawyer, and airman. I am a judge advocate (also known as JAG) in the United States Air Force, which in plain terms means I am an active-duty lawyer for the Department of the Air Force. At the time, I worked as a prosecutor and managed the criminal docket for the base I was assigned to.
The Department of the Air Force and Department of Defense have come a long way in supporting active-duty women as they juggle career and parenthood. It is crazy to think that it was only on June 2, 1948, that women were officially “allowed” to serve in the military despite having made immense contributions to war efforts in years prior. In 1971, women were allowed to serve while pregnant (albeit they had to meet certain “waiver” criteria). Prior to that, they were immediately involuntarily discharged for becoming pregnant because “pregnancy” was seen as incompatible with military service (and thus so was motherhood). We owe this win in part to the late Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg. Only seven years ago, all combat jobs were opened to women. Just this year, the Department of the Air Force made a dramatic shift in policy by providing the opportunity for women aviators to fly while pregnant during any trimester so long as it is safe medically and the commander supports the aviator’s decision to fly.
In between all of these milestones, there have been other monumental wins as the military has become a more inclusive workplace for women. Women and men now have up to 12 weeks of parental leave (if they choose). Women are deferred from temporary duty travel and deployment for 12 months after the birth of a child and have 12 months after the birth of a child to meet physical standards and take a physical fitness test to demonstrate standards compliance. Furthermore, women have the benefit of a comprehensive lactation policy that requires a location to pump that is not a bathroom and storage for the breast milk. All of these milestones have made it easier for women to serve through all phases of womanhood, particularly pregnancy and parenthood, but we are still chipping away at the iceberg.
When I returned to work in 2018 after my parental leave, I noticed that the Department of the Air Force lacked the support necessary to support women who chose to travel for work while balancing the demands of breastfeeding their children. As any lawyer would do, I turned to the law to see what needed to be changed to provide this support for service members and civilian employees. I quickly learned it would require a change to the Joint Travel Regulation (JTR): the document that governs the coverage of travel expenditures for all uniformed service members and Department of Defense civilian employees. Another thing I quickly learned was that I had no clue how to change the JTR and would need help. A very dear friend connected me with the Department of the Air Force Women’s Initiatives Team (WIT). The WIT’s mission is to identify barriers to women’s service in the Department of the Air Force and Department of Defense that influence and impact women’s propensity to serve, and advocate to eliminate those barriers through policy change.
That singular connection not only gave my idea the momentum it needed to become a reality, it also brought me to a group of people from all backgrounds and experiences that shared my passion for creating an inclusive Department of the Air Force to drive diversity, equity, and accessibility for all. I found my tribe. For this, I will forever be grateful. I found something I did not even know I needed. I found listening ears to bounce ideas off of, encouragement on the bad days, and a family to celebrate the small and big victories with. My hope is that everyone finds this sense of belonging at some point in their lives.
After nearly two and a half years of research and advocacy at all levels of the Department of the Air Force, Department of Defense, and our sister uniformed services (Army, Navy, Marines, Coast Guard, Public Health Service, and National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration) my seemingly small contribution to inclusivity became a reality. It felt surreal. On April 8, 2022, the JTR was changed to provide, for the first time ever, lactating uniformed service members and civilian employees the option to have their breast milk transport costs reimbursed when traveling for temporary duty away from their baby up to the age of two. This small step demonstrates a major advancement for supporting uniformed service members and civilian employees through all phases of life.
At the end of the day, parents seeking to advance in their careers should not have to sacrifice how they choose to feed their children because policies fail to be inclusive and provide support. When it comes to parenting, #SupportIsBest. This mantra drove our advocacy campaign across the Department of the Air Force and beyond. Now, this level of support is available throughout the Department of Defense and uniformed services.
As I reflect on those two-plus years and look toward the future, I am reminded of the power of like-minded individuals coming together to effectuate positive change and the impact that even just a few individuals can have on a society, a culture, and the lives of others. I encourage you not to walk past an issue. If something is impacting your ability to be successful, then I can assure you it is impacting others as well. Identify the problem. Find your tribe to help you drive change. Build your team, and race eagerly toward your goal. It will very likely take many hours, emails and phone calls, and change will most likely not be quick, but trust me, it will all be worth it. You may not be able to change the whole world, but you can make a change that will mean the world to someone else.
Sam Sliney is a mother of two and wife to an Army Green Beret. Since 2014, she has served in the U.S. Air Force as a Judge Advocate (JAG). She is currently assigned to a Special Operations Forces (SOF) unit where she provides legal advice on a wide array of legal issues to include operations and international law. Sam is passionate about creating an inclusive Department of the Air Force and Department of Defense to increase lethality of the joint force. Specifically, she advocates for equitable support and accessibility for women during all phases of womanhood, particularly pregnancy and post-partum.
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